Self-entitlement (Overcoming Entitlement Mentality)


We live in a society whereby there is too much self-entitlement. We tend to think that we deserve certain things in life. Growing up we think that we deserve the best home, the best education, the best family, the best friends; then we enter into another stage where we think that we deserve the best job as fast as possible, we think we deserve the best relationships, the best car, the best vacation opportunities – we think that we deserve the best things in life.

Many times, we think that other people owe us something, and because of that, we approach people with a self-entitlement mentality that indicates that they should give us what we want, when we want it. It is a world where many people want to get what they want, when they want it, the way they want it.

We live in a world where the fallen human nature manifests itself in so many ways, one of them being self-entitlement.

Self-entitlement is an issue that stems from the heart, it stems from a prideful heart, it stems from a person not wanting to acknowledge where they are weak and in need of help, it stems from relying on our own strength, it stems from a person who wants to advance their own selfish interests, usually, at the expense of others.

Apart from Christ, people are self-centered and they usually want things to work out in a way that will benefit them. When the expectations are not met, self-entitled people usually respond out in anger, they try out many ways to make things work out in their favor, they try to make things turn around. With self-entitlement, we operate in fear instead of faith.

Self-entitlement makes us think we do not deserve what we are facing. Many times we tend to think that we do not deserve to go through what we are going through, we think that we did not deserve to go through a rough childhood, we think that we did not deserve to have been brought up in a dysfunctional family, we think that we did not deserve to be born in a poor background, we think that we did not deserve to have been abused by that person.

We think that the person we are in a relationship with owes us many things that we have made up in our imaginations, we think that we did not deserve to have gone through that painful break-up, we think that we deserve to be married by now, we think that we deserve to have had children by a certain age; we think that our life ought to take a certain direction, and these unmet expectations usually lead to a lot of anger, frustration, and bitterness if we are not careful.

In the heart of human beings are many plans that they have made up for themselves, and somehow, they expect God to go along and give them the type of life they have already planned for themselves. We tend to forget that in the end, it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

There are many plans in a man’s heart, nevertheless, the Lord’s counsel, that will stand. Proverbs 19:21.

Many people want a comfortable life and they do not like anything that interrupts their sense of comfort.

Many people go on a blaming cycle, trying to blame people around them for how their life is turning out to be. Left on our own, we would seek the easiest and most comfortable path in life that we could find. Human beings, if left to do whatever they want, would hurt other people who they think are interrupting their path in life.

We are self-entitled people, who usually want things to work out the way we want, who want other people to behave and treat us the way we want them to, who want to see the outcomes that we want, who want life to turn out the way we want it to. Self-entitlement!

However, with time, we are faced with reality. Life is far from what we expected, things at times do not turn out the way we want them to, people will hurt and fail us many times, we realize that we cannot control other people nor manipulate situations to work out in our favor. We are faced with sobering moments of how real life is and how harmful self-entitlement can be.

We realize that we have a real enemy, the devil, whose aim is to destroy us. We realize that we are not in control, God is the One in control.

We realize that many times, we may not have what we had wanted, life may not take the direction that we had imagined, we realize many people are usually not what they appear to be, we realize that we have enemies left, right, and center, we realize that there are many people who do not wish us well, we realize that this world is full of sin, we realize that there are principles that govern how things work, we realize that the Word of God is true – that people do reap what they sow.

Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life. Galatians 6:7-8.

We come to realize that we cannot just live the way we want to live and not expect to face the consequences of our actions. We come to realize that we can either choose God, or the devil, but we better choose wisely; the enemy has nothing to offer, his only aim is to lead us to destruction. We have to learn to die to self, to crucify the flesh, and be led by the Spirit of God. Let go of self-entitlement.

With time we come to realize that God is sovereign, that He is in control. We come to realize that no matter how strong we may think we are, we cannot make it by ourselves without God. We have to come to a place in our lives where we realize how powerless we are without God.

We have to come to a place where we realize how sinful we are, and how much we need a Savior, Jesus Christ.

We have to come to a place whereby we realize why it took God sending His only begotten and sinless Son to die on the cross for our sins. We have to realize that without Christ Jesus, we are headed for destruction. Hell is too real, and because of that, God made the ultimate sacrifice showing how much He loves us, to save us from eternal damnation.

Stop living a life full of self-entitlement. We have to stop living a life of complaining about how life has been unfair to us, about how things just do not seem to be working out for us, about how much pain we have gone through in life; we have to stop and surrender to the King of kings and the Lord of lords.

We have to realize that we need God every moment of our lives, and realize that God is powerful enough to turn around even the most difficult and seemingly impossible situation and use it for our good and for His glory. The Word of God tells us that all things work out together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

It is time to stop living a self-entitled life and realize that everything we have, even our very life, is a gift from God. Let go of self-entitlement. The Bible tells us to do all things without complaining.

Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast the word of life, so that I may rejoice in the day of Christ that I have not run in vain or labored in vain. Philippians 2:14-16.

Let us learn to live a life of thanksgiving, not only when things are going well, but also when according to us nothing seems to be going well, and learn to surrender all to God. We are to live a life of thanksgiving, not because of our circumstances, but regardless of our circumstances.

Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:11-13.

The grace of God is always sufficient to take us through any situation that we may encounter in life.

“And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure. Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:7-10.


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Overcome self-entitlement

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